I want to pee alone.

(I may type it as seen above, but I say it with the accent... a lot.)

Is that really so much to want in life?

I know it's not just me. It's probably the lament of every mother on the planet.

When the kids are home, I'm constantly shooing them out of the bathroom doorway, only to have them continue talking to me through the bathroom door. It's not like they're with me every moment of the day - I'm not even sure how they get to the bathroom door. It must be a bit like telephone calls - kids spidey senses let them know I'm about to be unavailable for a minute or two, which causes them to race in my general direction.

It is not just the younger kids who excel at this. My teen has been known to text or call me with some minor question from the basement playroom - lazy teen isn't a stereotype for nothing - at the very moment I start walking toward the bathroom.

When the children aren't home it's the dogs. They'll follow me right in. If I shut the door, they'll lie down on the other side, making a 130-lb expanse of canines to climb over three minutes later.

And, today... children are playing video games. Dogs are napping by their feet, worn out from playing outside. I head down the hall, walk into the bathroom, turn

to shut the door...

... and in rolls Annabeth, my daughter's teddy bear hamster.

...sigh...